What Time Do You Start Being Nice?
I don't parent well before coffee. I would be a wonderful mom if the hours of operation were from 10am -5pm, and if coffee was given to me intravenously before I ever opened my eyes. The next best thing is, like I have described before, when Brent delivers coffee to me in bed. I always tell my kids that I need to drink at least one full cup of hot coffee or I start the day mean and grouchy. One little guy tiptoed into the kitchen one morning and quietly asked "is your coffee done? what time do you start being nice?".
One day, several pairs of little footsteps hit the floor running and screaming far too early. Mayhem and destruction were imminent. There had been no intravenous coffee, there had been no coffee delivered to me in bed. My eyes were heavy and my ears were bleeding from the noise. My spirit was weary. I thought about throwing all of the kids out on the proverbial curb and going back to bed.
Instead, I hid in the kitchen, plugged my ears, drank my coffee, and read these words from Ephesians: "You..exhaled disobedience. We all did it, all of us doing what we felt like doing, when we felt like doing it, all of us in the same boat. It's a wonder God didn't lose his temper and do away with the whole lot of us. Instead, in mercy and with an incredible love, he embraced us."
I decided that the whole lot of them could stay, and I embraced them. And then I hid some more. And I drank some more coffee.
I find myself going back to this morning often. Mostly because most mornings are exactly like this. But also because I am constantly reminded how unlovable and undeserving I am. And yet I am loved. I am constantly reminded that sometimes, the most unloveable people with the most unlikeable behavior, need loved the most.
Loving like that isn't easy. Loving like that doesn't happen between 10 am and 5 pm. It doesn't happen with intravenous coffee support. Loving without condition has to happen without our conditions.
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